Let’s all Talk Mental Health is an online hub for parents, caregivers, family members and educators to support their teens through mental health struggles, to understand the issues and to find out more about routes for help. We are here to help you to help them with every challenge that they may be facing: anxiety, eating disorders, body dysmorphia, low mood & depression, ADHD, Autism, OCD, self harm and more.
 
Featuring LIVE sessions with the UK’s top clinical psychologists, therapists & psychiatrists, every session includes at least 30 minutes of anonymous audience Q&A. Let’s all Talk Mental Health also includes on-demand access to a huge library of in-depth talks & interviews as well as regular “Ask Away” audience Q&A’s with our resident Clinical Psychologist, Dr Sarah-Jane Knight.
 
Your subscription gives you up to 30+ LIVE sessions with audience Q&A plus access to the full on-demand library of an extra sessions. 

Choose from monthly, 6 or 12 monthly subscriptions £5 per month. Or if your teen attends one of our Membership Schools, you can join with your FREE school access pass.

Let's All Talk Mental Health

The World Health Organisation's report on teenage health found that boys are more likely to bully and cyberbully but that girls are more likely to be cyberbullied. Also what is really concerning because of the impact on mental health, is that younger adolescents are particularly at risk of being bullied.

We have to ask, where this stems from? We know that social media has upped the ante over the past 3-4 years. For all the good it can do, it also has the potential to ensnare young people: What they do online can be turned against them in a different context, very easily.

We don't really think **Teens are Mean**, but we do think it's more important than ever that we find out; what teens are coping with that is changing their developing teen personalities and personas; how online peer pressure starts and how it can affect wellbeing; how we can help support teens to be braver and more resilient; and how parents can challenge the way their children talk to one another. We hope you join for what will be a fascinating conversation.


Mean Teens: How to Help

# Helping Teens Cope with Exam Stress & Pressure

While most exams naturally trigger stress in teenagers, certain factors and beliefs can dial up the pressure levels. These may include feeling unprepared through lack of revision or procrastination, coupled with fears of failure and/or catastrophic thoughts regarding poor results.  Stress levels typically peak during the exam period when there is intense preparation, revision, and grade-related worries, but they can still cause a significant impact on a students' mental and emotional well-being. As parents and carers, it’s not always easy to know how best to support young people through these times.

This week, we were joined by Dr Maryhan, world-renowned parenting expert and psychologist, to discuss exam stress and pressure. Dr Maryan talked about the difference between exam stress and anxiety, the concept of burnout and helpful strategies for parents and carers to support teenagers during exam periods. 

### **Exam Stress vs. Anxiety: Understanding the difference**

Dr Maryhn started by explaining the difference between stress and anxiety. Exam stress is typically confined to the period surrounding exams. It involves the pressure of preparation, revising, and the performance anxiety related to achieving good grades. Unlike general anxiety, which is pervasive and affects various aspects of life, exam stress is situation-specific and time-bound.

### **How Burnout can affect Teenagers**

Dr Maryhan touched on the subject of burnout, explaining how it isn’t just an adult issue but something that young people can experience too. It manifests as physical and emotional exhaustion due to prolonged stress, leading to a state where the teen feels completely depleted. Recognising the signs of burnout early and implementing strategies to prevent it is crucial for maintaining well-being.

### **Effective Revision Techniques: Learning vs. Revising**

A common mistake during exam preparation is the confusion between learning and revising. Dr Maryhan explained how effective revision should involve revisiting already understood material rather than attempting to learn new concepts in a compressed time frame. This approach reduces stress and enhances the efficiency of study sessions.

### **Gender and Revision: Is there a difference?**

Dr Maryhan also recommended considering different needs for boys and girls. Generally speaking, girls are more likely to conform to societal norms when it comes to studying, often focusing on meticulous presentation rather than effective learning consolidation. Conversely, boys can be more physically active and may struggle with extended periods of stationary revision. It's important to tailor study techniques to all tendencies and individual preferences, and find out what effective revision means for your teenager rather than simply revising for hours at a time.

### **Tips for parents and carers**

**Create a Conducive Study Environment:** Ensure your teen has a quiet, comfortable and well-lit place to study. If their usual study spot isn’t ideal, consider alternative locations within the home or even outside, like libraries or quiet cafes. 

**Enforce Device-Free Time:** Limit distractions by enforcing periods where electronic devices are put away. This helps students focus on revision without the constant interruptions from social media and other online activities.

**Establish Boundaries and Balance:** While studying is important, it is crucial to maintain a balanced routine. Encourage regular breaks, physical activity, and socialising. This not only prevents burnout but also keeps their mind fresh.

**Help maintain healthy habits** - this can be challenging during stressful periods, but it’s crucial for optimal brain function and overall well-being to maintain habits such as proper nutrition, hydration and adequate sleep. 

**Avoid Micromanaging:** Allow your child to take ownership of their revision and how they do it. While it’s important to show interest and support, constant oversight can lead to increased stress and dependency.

**Discourage Over-Elaborate Revision Timetables:** While having a plan is good, overly detailed timetables can be daunting and difficult to follow. Encourage a more flexible approach that allows for adjustments as needed.

**Manage Your Own Stress:** Children often pick up on their parents' anxieties. Managing your own stress and maintaining a calm demeanour can help create a more relaxed home environment conducive to studying.

**Avoid Nagging:** Constant reminders about studying can increase stress for both the parent and the child. Instead, have open discussions about their schedule and how they plan to manage their workload.

**Celebrate Efforts, Not Just Outcomes:** Praise your child for their effort and dedication rather than just the outcomes of their exams. This reinforces the value of hard work and persistence, regardless of the results.

Lastly, Dr Maryhan highlighted the importance of remembering that while exams are a stressful part of academic life, they do not define a student's worth or future success. A supportive approach that emphasises well-being can make a significant difference in a teen’s ability to manage stress and perform to their best ability.


Helping Teens Cope with Exam Stress & Pressure 

Embracing autism in teens involves recognising their distinctive strengths and helping them through the specific challenges they face in making their way in the world. During adolescence, ASD symptoms may become more apparent due to the significant changes this key stage brings. Dr. Jane Gilmour, with her incredible expertise, provides practical insights on supporting autistic teens through these transitions.


Autism & Teens; what to expect and how to help

# **Understanding and Supporting Teenagers with Negative Thinking Traps**

Every day we have tens of thousands of thoughts. According to some studies, up to 80% of them are negative (and 95% of those are repetitive from the day before). So, if you have negative thoughts, you're perfectly normal.

**Teens and Negative Thinking**

While transient for many, some individuals, especially teenagers, grapple with negative thoughts, often stemming from personal experiences or developmental changes. Layer on intense emotions, such as embarrassment or discomfort, and you have a recipe for significant impacts on self-esteem, which essentially shapes how teenagers perceive and value themselves.

When negative emotions are directed inward, they can manifest as self-criticism, becoming a major source of poor self-esteem. This, in turn, can deeply affect a teenager's mental health, potentially leading to conditions such as social anxiety, depression, and eating disorders. Addressing the root causes of low self-esteem becomes supremely important in promoting resilience and better mental health outcomes for teenagers.

**Impact of the Online World and Social Media on Negative Thinking Patterns:**

In today’s digital age, the online world and social media wield significant influence over teens' perceptions. Nihara explained how the constant comparison on social media can cultivate feelings of inadequacy and loneliness, subsequently triggering negative thinking patterns. Despite teens' logical understanding of the curated nature of others' posts, showcasing only the best aspects of their lives, they can still be emotionally impacted. This emotional response often manifests as FOMO (fear of missing out) or feelings of dissatisfaction and inadequacy, contributing to a cycle of negativity.

**The Role of Parents and Caregivers**

Parents and caregivers play a vital role in helping teenagers navigate negative thinking patterns. Here are some strategies to consider:

1.  **Feedback on Specific Behaviours**: Be clear and specific when giving feedback to avoid reinforcing all-or-nothing thinking patterns.
2.  **Use "I" Statements**: Instead of accusatory language, use statements that express your observations and offer help in problem-solving.
3.  **Acknowledge Effort and Progress**: Emphasise the importance of effort and progress, not just outcomes, to foster a growth mindset.
4.  **Set Realistic Expectations**: Help teenagers set achievable goals and avoid comparisons that can exacerbate negative thinking.
5.  **Remind Them of Past Successes**: Encourage them to recall times when they have successfully overcome negative thinking.
6.  **Encourage Self-Reflection**: Teach teenagers to recognise automatic negative thoughts and challenge their validity.
7.  **Provide Tools for Change**: Introduce them to resources like mental health apps that offer self-help strategies in a user-friendly format.

## **Addressing Specific Negative Thinking Patterns**

Teenagers may fall into various negative thinking traps, such as all-or-nothing thinking, catastrophic thinking, mental filtering, and emotional reasoning. Understanding these patterns can help in developing targeted interventions. For example, teaching a teenager to differentiate between feeling and thinking can be a powerful tool in combating emotional reasoning.

## **When Professional Help is Needed**

While parents and caregivers can offer significant support, there are times when professional help is necessary. If negative thinking patterns are persistent and interfere with daily functioning, it may be time to seek the assistance of a mental health professional.

## **Final Thoughts & Resources**

The journey through adolescence is a tricky one and negative thinking traps are just one of the many challenges teenagers may face. By providing a supportive environment, encouraging open communication, and equipping them with the right tools, we can help our teenagers develop resilience and a more positive outlook on life.

*“Remember, it's not about changing the wind's direction but adjusting our sails to navigate through it.” *

With the right support and strategies, we can guide our teenagers toward a healthier, more positive mindset.

**RESOURCES: **

Dr Nihara Krause offers 5 free apps for children and teens: <https://www.niharakrause.co.uk/mental-health-apps/>

Calm Harm - reducing the risk of self-harm

Clear Fear - helping manage anxiety

Combined Minds - working on resilience and mental health challenges

Move Mood - helping behaviours associated with low mood and depression

Worth Warrior - challenge and change thoughts, emotions, behaviours and body image issues underlying low self-worth.


Negative Thinking Traps: How to Help

# **SESSION SUMMARY**

# **Suicide Prevention in Teens: What parents need to know**

As parents, it's essential to comprehend teen suicide prevention in the same way we do other safety or health issues. We were accompanied by Dick Moore for this very important discussion on suicide prevention. Dick, as well as being an experienced educator and advocate for youth mental health, has his own personal story of young suicide and makes this very sensitive subject, approachable.

**The Importance of Emotional Honesty**

Dick talked about the significance of parents and educators being emotionally honest as a foundation for helping teenagers navigate their own complex feelings. By modeling regulated emotional expression, we teach our young people that it's normal to experience different emotions and that dealing with life's challenges is a part of growing up.

### **The Impact of Social Media**

Our conversation also touched on the influence of social media on teens' mental health. While recognising its benefits, Dick highlighted the importance of educating both parents and children about the potential risks associated with social media use, such as oversharing and the pressure of likes and comments. He encouraged the use of parental controls and open family discussions about online behavior.

### **Recognising Signs of Distress**

Dick provided guidance on identifying signs that a teen might be considering suicide, such as changes in behaviour or mood. He stressed the importance of taking any mention of suicidal thoughts seriously and seeking professional help when necessary.

### **Key Questions to Assess Risk**

To assess the risk of suicide, Dick shared three critical questions to ask:

1.  Are you thinking about suicide?
2.  Have you got a plan?
3.  What's keeping you safe?

These direct and unambiguous questions can help gauge the immediate risk and determine the next steps in providing support.

### **A Message of Hope and Resilience**

Dick's message was one of hope and resilience. He encouraged parents to maintain open lines of communication, to be emotionally honest, and to ensure that their love is unconditional. He reminded us that adolescence is a time of significant change and that with support and understanding, young people can find their path to happiness.

### **Seeking Further Guidance**

For those seeking further guidance or support, resources like the [Charlie Waller Trust](https://www.charliewaller.org/resource-library) and [Papyrus’ Hopeline247](https://www.papyrus-uk.org/papyrus-hopeline247/) offer assistance for those affected by these issues. 


Suicide Prevention in Teens: What parents need to know

SESSION SUMMARY

# **Helping a Teen who Self-Harms**

Recognising the challenge of Self-Harm in Teenagers requires understanding and compassion. It is estimated that approximately 10-20% of young individuals will resort to self-harm as a means of coping. This struggle can leave parents feeling frightened, overwhelmed and in search of solutions to support their children.

## **Help for Parents: Understanding and Responding to Self-Harm**

Discovering your child's self-harm can be emotionally challenging. Try to approach the situation with empathy, aiming to understand the underlying emotions driving this behaviour. Self-harm is often a teen's way of coping with emotional pain or dysregulation and should be met with compassion rather than judgement.

*   Open communication: Create a safe space for your teen to express their feelings without fear of criticism or reproach.
*   Curiosity: Understand about the factors contributing to their self-harm.
*   Prioritise Safety: It is important to prioritise a teenagers well-being by restricting access to potential risks. 
*   Seek professional help: Engage with healthcare providers to understand the best course of action and to access appropriate help.

﻿

## **Help for Schools:**

Schools also play an important role in supporting teens. Educators should be equipped to recognise signs of self-harm and respond appropriately, ensuring that their actions contribute to a teen's sense of safety and well-being.

*   Staff Education and Training: Help all staff to recognise and address self-harm.
*   Safe & Supportive Environment: Encourage an environment that supports open dialogue about mental health, making it easier for students to discuss self-harm and seek help.
*   Clear Policies and Procedures: Establish and communicate clear policies for handling self-harm cases, including parental collaboration but also recognising individual needs for confidentiality/privacy.

## **Support for Teenagers: Therapeutic Approaches and Emotional Regulation**

Therapies that can help teenagers understand their emotions, recognise triggers, and develop healthier ways to manage stress and anxiety can be transformative for teens struggling with self-harm.

*   Professional help including (DBT) Dialectical Behavior and (MBT) Mentalisation Based Treatment.

## **Final Thoughts: A Collaborative Path to Healing**

Russell finished the session by adding that , “addressing self-harm begins with creating better communication, particularly around distress, which involves expressing curiosity and creating open doors  for young people to share their needs freely.”

The journey to overcoming self-harm is not one that a teen should travel alone. It requires a collaborative effort from parents, educators, healthcare professionals, and the teens themselves. 

## **Resources:**

**NHSN - Distractions that can help**

Resource Link:[ https://bit.ly/nhsndist](https://bit.ly/nhsndist)

Description: Provides distractions to support individuals in coping with self-harm tendencies.

**Young people who self harm - A guide for school staff**

Resource Link:[ https://bit.ly/ypwsh](https://bit.ly/ypwsh)

Description: Offers guidance for school staff on understanding and assisting young people dealing with self-harm.

**Self harm - Guidelines for staff within school and residential settings**

Resource Link:[ https://bit.ly/dshoxford](https://bit.ly/dshoxford)

Description: Provides guidelines for staff in school and residential settings to effectively address self-harm issues.

**Understanding and responding to children and young people at risk of self-harm and suicide**

Resource Link:[ https://bit.ly/DSHcamb](https://bit.ly/DSHcamb)

Description: Offers insights and strategies for understanding and responding to the risk of self-harm and suicide in young individuals.

**Blog: How do I get my teenager to listen to me?**

Resource Link:[ https://bit.ly/teenslistening](https://bit.ly/teenslistening)

Description: A blog post addressing communication challenges with teenagers, potentially beneficial for parents seeking effective ways to connect.


Helping a Teen who Self-Harms

**SESSION SUMMARY**

# **Understanding and Addressing Teen Gaming Addiction**

We know that an increasing number of teenagers are addicted to gaming, which predominantly affects boys who can spend hours gaming online every day. While Gaming Addiction is a relatively new mental health concern (affecting a relatively small percentage of young people), it is still important for parents and educators to understand the impact of gaming habits on young individuals and the impact it can have on their mental health.

**The Reality of Gaming Addiction**

While gaming offers numerous benefits, such as enhancing cognitive skills, creativity, and teamwork, it can become problematic for a small percentage of individuals. Studies indicate that less than 1% of the population may develop what is known as a gaming disorder. This condition arises when gaming behaviour becomes compulsive, significantly impacting a person's quality of life and daily functioning.

## **Signs of Gaming Addiction**

Parents may notice changes in their teen's behaviour that could signal a gaming addiction. These signs include:

*   Excessive gaming, sometimes upwards of 10-14 hours a day
*   Neglecting school, sleep, personal hygiene, toileting and eating.
*   Emotional disturbances, such as anxiety, low mood, anger, or frustration
*   Physical health decline due to poor diet and lack of exercise
*   Social withdrawal and prioritising gaming over other activities

## **When Gaming Becomes an Issue**

The transition from a hobby to an addiction can be gradual, often linked to significant life events or difficulties in social interactions. Parents might observe their child refusing to attend school, exhibiting angry or aggressive behaviour, or being unable to set limits on gaming time.

## **Strategies for Parents**

Helping develop healthy gaming habits, parents can:

*   Engage in open, curious conversations about their teen's gaming interests
*   Establish a balanced routine with agreed-upon limits for gaming time
*   Create tech-free zones and times, such as during meals or before bed
*   Encourage shared family activities that don't involve screens
*   Offer rewards for positive changes in gaming behaviour

## **Support for Families**

For families facing severe challenges, professional help is available. The National Centre for Gaming Disorders provides treatment for individuals aged 13 and over who may struggle with gaming addiction. Parents and schools can self-refer for services including therapy, support groups, and workshops for parents to better understand and address the issue. For more information: <https://www.cnwl.nhs.uk/national-centre-gaming-disorders>

## **Final Thoughts**

It's crucial to approach the topic of gaming with empathy and understanding. Open communication and collaboration between parents and teens is key to creating lasting changes around gaming habits. If you're concerned about your teen's gaming behaviour, remember that help is available, and positive change is possible.


Getting Help for Teen Gaming Addiction 

**SESSION SUMMARY**

# **Ask Away - Teen mental health Q\&A**

Navigating the emotional landscape of our teenagers can be a challenge which is why we regularly dedicate a full 60 minutes to answering questions about your teens. In this session, we received a variety of questions on difficult problems and challenges that parents are facing.

## **The Digital Dilemma: Technology's Impact on Teens**

In today's technology driven world, the advantages and drawbacks of technology coexist. While it provides unprecedented access to information and social opportunities, its rapid evolution poses challenges for parents and carers to understand its impact on young minds.

### **Boundaries and Downtime**

Setting boundaries is crucial; recognising teens' potential lack of maturity in navigating the digital landscape independently, parents should establish controls on screen time and content access. This not only falls within parental rights but is also a necessary measure for guidance and protection. 

Additionally, ensuring teens have designated breaks from devices, particularly at night, is vital for both their mental well-being and academic performance. Parents should feel empowered to enforce these breaks,despite potential pushback from their children.

## **Addressing Exam Stress and Anxiety**

Exam stress is a common concern among teenagers. Providing support and structure is vital to help them manage their workload. Encouraging breaks and leisure activities can prevent burnout and promote a healthier balance between school responsibilities and personal life.

## **Social Challenges and Friendship Dynamics**

The transition to secondary school can bring about significant social changes for teens. It's not uncommon for some to struggle with forming close friendships or left to feel isolated. Parents and schools can have an active role in this to help identify supportive peer groups. Parents can consider forms of social coaching to help teens navigate their social environment.

## **The Role of Parents in Fostering Confidence**

Parents play a critical role in helping their teens build confidence and resilience. Open, non-judgmental conversations about their experiences and feelings can provide valuable support. It's also important to celebrate small victories and encourage a growth mindset.

## **Final Thoughts**

As we continue to explore the different aspects of teen mental health, it's clear that a proactive, curious and compassionate approach is key. By working together, we can create an environment where teens feel supported, understood, and equipped to face the challenges of adolescence and adulthood.


Ask Away - Teen mental health Q&A 

SESSION SUMMARY

# Understanding and Managing Teenagers' Relationship with Technology

As parents, educators, and guardians, it's crucial to stay informed and proactive about the digital environment that envelops our youth. Today, we're focusing on the balance between embracing the benefits of technology and mitigating its potential disruptions, especially in educational settings.

## The Government's Stance on Mobile Phones in Schools

Recent guidelines have been introduced with the intention of limiting mobile phone use during school hours. The government's rationale is clear: reduce distractions and enhance student behavior in classrooms. While opinions on this policy may vary, it's an acknowledgment of the significant role that technology plays in our children's lives, both as a tool for learning and a source of potential concern.

## Is Technology Harming Our Teens?

To explore this question, we're joined by Graham Lowe, a safeguarding lead consultant and online safety specialist. With over two decades of experience in the education sector, Graham brings a wealth of knowledge on how to navigate the complex digital landscape our teenagers find themselves in.

### The Attraction of Technology

Graham explains that technology's allure lies in its design, which is aimed at maximizing user engagement. Features like auto-play and infinite scroll on platforms such as Netflix, YouTube, and TikTok are specifically engineered to keep users hooked. While these design choices make business sense for tech companies, they also pose challenges for young users who may struggle with managing their screen time.

### The Risks and Benefits

The digital world offers immense opportunities for learning, creativity, and connection. However, it also presents risks that need to be addressed proactively. Graham introduces the "four Cs" framework to categorize these risks: content, contact, conduct, and commerce. By understanding these areas, parents and educators can better guide teenagers in navigating online spaces safely.

### Strategies for Managing Screen Time

For parents seeking to encourage self-discipline in their teens' digital habits, Graham suggests open communication and setting clear expectations. Tools like Google Family Link, Microsoft Family Safety, and iOS Screen Time can provide insights into usage patterns and allow for the implementation of boundaries. However, these technical solutions should complement, not replace, ongoing conversations about responsible technology use.

### Final Thoughts

Graham's parting advice is simple yet powerful: don't be intimidated by the technology itself. Focus on the behaviors surrounding its use and maintain open lines of communication with your teenagers. By doing so, you can foster an environment where technology serves as a positive force in their development.

Remember, as we navigate this digital era together, it's our collective responsibility to ensure that our teenagers are equipped with the knowledge and skills to use technology wisely and healthily. Stay tuned for more insights and discussions on this critical topic.


Is technology hurting teens? 

# Empowering Young Minds: Nurturing Self-Esteem in Adolescents

Empowering Teens to Navigate Self-Esteem Challenges

This week, we focused on the importance of self-esteem during the teenage years—a period marked by significant growth and challenges.

### Understanding Self-Esteem, Self-Assurance, and Self-Confidence

Self-esteem is the overarching sense of one's value and worth, shaped by experiences, situations, and social interactions. Self-assurance, conversely, is the belief in one's abilities and the capacity to manage challenges, including learning from mistakes. Self-confidence ties these concepts together, encompassing the acceptance of oneself and trust in one's judgment, opinions, and values.

### The Complex Landscape of Teenage Self-Esteem

Today's teenagers navigate a complex social landscape where their actions and choices are highly visible and open to judgment. The digital age has amplified this visibility, with the potential for long-lasting impacts due to the permanence of online content. This constant feedback loop can significantly affect teenagers' self-esteem, especially when they are still developing a solid sense of self.

### Tackling Low Self-Esteem

Parents and educators play a vital role in supporting teenagers through these turbulent years. It's essential to model healthy self-esteem, highlight strengths, and gently challenge negative self-perceptions. Specificity in praise and feedback can help counteract the wall of negative thoughts many teenagers face.

Affirmations can also be a powerful tool. Encouraging teenagers to voice positive statements about themselves can gradually shift their mindset from self-criticism to self-acceptance.

### When to Seek Additional Support

If a teenager's self-esteem issues persist despite efforts to address them, it may be time to seek professional help. This could involve contacting school support services, consulting with a GP, or exploring private therapy options. It's crucial to approach this step with sensitivity, ensuring the teenager understands the intent is to support, not to judge.

### The Role of Educators

Teachers can incorporate self-esteem building into their curriculum, particularly in PSHE lessons. Group discussions can foster a sense of shared experience and mutual support. While numerous resources are available for this purpose, the key is to encourage open dialogue and self-reflection among students.

### Final Thoughts

The journey through adolescence is rarely smooth, but with the right support and strategies, teenagers can develop a stronger sense of self-esteem. Encourage open communication, validate their feelings, and provide a safe space for them to express themselves. Remember, every voice matters, and by fostering an environment of understanding and acceptance, we can help our young people thrive.

**CPD QR Code** 

Register to download your CPD certificate and collect your CPD credits for this session with the QR code below: 

![](https://chart.googleapis.com/chart?chs=200x200\&cht=qr\&chl=https://thecpd.group/webinar/portal/b3abd101-4b7a-400f-a887-4549cb245fd9)


Tackling Low Self Esteem in Teens  -> FOR CPD SCROLL BELOW

# Building a Healthy Mindset in Teens: Insights from Dr. Bettina Hohnen

In this session we delved into the crucial topic of nurturing a healthy mindset in teenagers. We had the pleasure of engaging with Dr. Bettina Hohnen, a seasoned clinical psychologist with over 25 years of experience working with families. Dr. Hohnen shared her profound insights on how parents can lay the groundwork for their teens' psychological well-being.

### Understanding the Teenage Brain

The journey begins with understanding the developmental changes during the teenage years. Dr. Hohnen emphasizes the importance of recognizing the five key focuses of the teenage brain:

1.  **Finding their tribe:** Integrating with peers is a critical part of a teen's life.
2.  **Wired for exploration:** Teens are naturally inclined to seek new experiences.
3.  **Solidifying self-identity:** They are constantly asking, "Who am I?"
4.  **Exercising autonomy:** The push for independence is strong during these years.
5.  **Experiencing intense emotions:** Teens feel emotions deeply, both the highs and the lows.

By understanding these drives, parents can empathize with their teens' behaviors, leading to less reactionary and more supportive parenting.

### The Concept of Base Camp

Dr. Hohnen introduces the concept of the 'base camp'—a metaphor for the home environment where teens can recharge emotionally. As 'base camp leaders,' parents should be consistent, predictable, and nurturing. This secure foundation allows teens to confidently explore the world, knowing they have a safe place to return to for support and guidance.

### The Balance of Push and Protect

One of the most challenging aspects of parenting is knowing when to push and when to protect. Dr. Hohnen advises allowing teens to lead and learn through experience, even if it means they might fail at times. This approach helps them develop problem-solving skills and resilience.

### Addressing Tough Topics

When teens encounter difficult experiences, it's essential to talk through these challenges and guide them back onto a safe and secure path. This guidance should respect their autonomy and encourage them to be who they want to be.

### For Teachers: Giving Feedback

Teachers play a pivotal role in shaping teens' self-identity. Dr. Hohnen suggests a 2-to-1 ratio of positive feedback to constructive criticism, focusing on effort and strategy rather than just outcomes. It's also crucial to revisit and repair any comments that may have been harmful.

### For Parents Who Over-Accommodate

For parents who find themselves over-accommodating, Dr. Hohnen recommends self-reflection to understand the underlying reasons. Setting small goals and seeking support can help parents gradually shift towards encouraging more independence in their teens.

### Final Thoughts

Parenting a teenager is inherently uncomfortable, but it's through these struggles that both teens and parents grow. Embracing the discomfort and supporting each other through the challenges can lead to significant learning and development.


Building the Foundations for Mentally Healthy Minds

# Understanding and Supporting Teenagers Through Family Challenges

This session focused on the complexities of supporting teenagers as they navigate the emotional turbulence that can arise from family dynamics, particularly during times of parental separation.

Our guest, Esther Eisin Cohen, brings over three decades of expertise as a systemic family psychotherapist. Her insights shed light on the often-overlooked emotional landscape of teenagers grappling with the breakdown of their parents' relationship.

### The Impact of Parental Separation on Teenagers

When parents part ways, teenagers on the cusp of adulthood can experience a profound sense of insecurity. The dissolution of a parental union often represents the crumbling of one of the walls of their secure base. This can lead to feelings of sadness, loss, and grief, which can be particularly isolating if they lack a peer group that shares similar experiences.

### Navigating the Emotional Aftermath

Esther emphasizes the importance of parents maintaining steadiness throughout the separation process. Self-care is paramount; parents must don their own "oxygen masks" before they can effectively care for their children. Providing a coherent narrative about the changes unfolding within the family unit can help young people make sense of the situation, despite the challenges that may arise in achieving coherence between separating parents.

### Communication is Key

Open lines of communication are crucial. Parents should strive to listen and be curious about their teenagers' perceptions and concerns. However, not all questions from teenagers may be appropriate to answer immediately. It's a delicate balance between being transparent and protecting them from adult complexities, especially when it comes to sensitive topics like infidelity.

### Prioritising Teenagers' Needs

Parents must ensure that their teenagers feel seen and heard, even amidst high emotions. This involves inviting questions and fostering a space where teenagers can express their worries without fear of the conversation becoming a family secret.

### Co-Parenting with Respect

Co-parenting after a separation requires effort and respect. It's vital to involve both parents in decision-making and, on important occasions, maintain a respectful dialogue about the other parent in front of the children. This helps prevent internal conflicts within the young person, who may feel torn if they perceive one parent as attacking the other.

### The Role of Self-Forgiveness

Parents are human and may occasionally slip up. Acknowledging mistakes and offering apologies can model positive behaviour for teenagers, demonstrating that it's possible to repair relationships and move forward constructively.

### Encouraging Healthy Relationships

It's not just about managing family breakdowns; it's also about fostering an environment where teenagers can learn about and cultivate healthy relationships. This includes understanding the influence of family scripts and deciding whether to replicate, ditch, or innovate these scripts in their own lives.

### Seeking Help

When parents struggle, it's essential to seek support from friends, therapists, GPs, or religious leaders. Letting schools know about any significant changes at home can also provide a supportive context for the teenager's daily life.

In conclusion, the journey through teenage years can be tumultuous, especially during family separations. By staying steady, maintaining open communication, and fostering respect, parents can navigate these challenges and support their teenagers' emotional well-being. Remember, it's never too late to repair relationships and show compassion, both for oneself and for others.


Supporting Teens through family and relationship difficulties

Emotional Based School Avoidance is perhaps one of the most agonising and challenging issues that teens and families are currently struggling with. Emotionally-based school avoidance (EBSA) is a complicated issue interlinked with mental health and wellbeing in young people including anxiety, depression and other mental health concerns or neurodiversity's. For this session, we are pleased to welcome Dr Sarah-Jane Knight and Cathy Ellot, Head, Streatham & Clapham High School to talk about whole child and holistic approach to getting teens back and keeping them at school.


Is Your Teen Struggling with School Avoidance? What Parents & Schools can do to Help. 

We are joined by Dr Amita Jassi to talk about teen Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD), and understanding some of the issues with changing body shapes and external pressures that might be influencing our teenagers in a different and harmful direction.

Discover how to recognise the signs of BDD in your teen, including obsession with appearance and comparison to others, and explore its impact on mental health and self-esteem. Dr Jassi will offer some essential guidance for parents and family members, with considerations for neurodiverse teens and the potential effects on siblings.


Body Dysmorphic Disorder: How to support your teen

We talk to Clinical Psychologist, Dr Sarah-Jane Knight about how to handle a teen who is determined to treat you as their enemy. We will be discussing...

How do you handle difficult teenage behaviours such as arguing, swearing, moodiness or angry outbursts?

How do you know whether this is part of teen development or a sign that they are struggling with their mental health.

What do you do with a teen who regularly tells you they hate you?

Top tips to have conversations with them when they are breaking all the rules.

How can you support yourself and the family through these disruptions?


Why does my teen hate me so much?

Gender identity forms part of your sense of self; connecting with your identity and being seen and accepted by others is crucially important for teenagers, their mental health, wellbeing and resilience.

In this session, we will talk about gender-related distress in teenagers, how these relate to a young person’s mental health and what to do to support them through their adolescence.


Supporting adolescents who experience gender-related distress

With the help of the incredible Fiona Spargo-Mabbs, Founder of DSM Foundation, we will be hearing about the substances available to young people today and we will be learning about the effects, risks and risk factors of drugs, vapes and alcohol. We will also discuss some of the signs to look out for and how you can tell if your child might be using drugs. We will hear some of Fiona’s practical strategies to help keep teens safe and Fiona will is also on hand to listen and respond to your questions about your teens.


Substance Abuse and Vaping: Keeping your teen safe this summer

Dr Sarah Jane Knight joins us to talk about "Supporting Teens through School Transitions" covering moves to new educational settings in Y7, Y9, College & Sixth Form. We’ll talk about how to support them through these changes, routines over the summer holidays, and how to get them ready to go back to school/college in September.
